The other day, we noted that our man Duncan Quinn was getting ready for the ride of his life at the Red Bull Global Rallycross event on Long Island. Read on for his report from the pits…

Now that my eyeballs have had a chance to return to their original God-intended shape, I can attest to the fact that GRC cars are incredibly uncomfortable.

And quick.

Being savaged by one is only to be recommended to those with all their faculties fully intact. As in strong sphincters throughout the system.

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And their own teeth.

Explaining what it feels like to be strapped into one of these things is a little like trying to describe how it feels to be punched in the face by a gloveless 240-lb. MMA fighter with malicious intent.

It’s most akin to how I imagine trying to hold onto a cliff face with your fingernails and toes as you careen down it headfirst naked.

A sort of delusion of grip and control only somewhat reinforced by the fact that you haven’t hit anything that hurt yet.

Rhys Millen and Emma Gilmour - Action

In all seriousness, though, these things accelerate in a way that beggars belief.

Blurry vision, compressed eyeballs and rearranged internal organs are not the norm. Even in beasts with a ridiculous turn of speed.

Of course, being a passenger is very different to having the heads up of control.

And net—net we didn’t go that fast in terms of actual velocity.

Rhys Millen, Patrik Sandell, Emma Gilmour, Scott Speed - Action

But nonetheless, this made hot laps at Fiorano feel like kiddie school.

Once underway, the battle of good and evil between the tires, tarmac and traction was graphically conveyed through the chassis, tyre screeching and feeling like your face was melting off as you went round each corner.

Which made getting airborne over the jump once a lap feel almost as refreshing as diving into a cool pool on a scorching hot day.

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Ah, those moments of bliss.

So apparently Red Bull really can give you wings.

Who knew…

—DQ

Photos © Al Padron/Redbull Global Rallycross