Ah, the factory tour.

When it comes to the average automobile factory, unless you’re into dodging forklifts or the smell of robots in the morning, there are few things more stupefying than watching big machines punch rivets into little machines.

Unless, of course, when you say “factory tour” you mean driving an SL63 AMG to Montreaux, Switzerland or running a CL63 to Munich for a round of golf with PGA swing guru Robert Baker.

Driving an SL63 AMG to Montreaux, Switzerland or running a CL63 to Munich for a round of golf

That’s what AMG means when it offers a peek into its facilities.

Called Spirit of AMG – Emotion Tours, there are eight packages in total, four of which will reveal the nuts and bolts underneath the blitzing-quick bliss that is an AMG.

Each of the three lifestyle packages starts in Affalterbach, Germany, where you’ll get a glimpse of the company’s ‘One Man, One Engine’ philosophy.

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Yes, each AMG engine is built by one worker, and when he’s finished building it, he autographs it. Really.

Finished with your lesson in naturally aspirated and twin-turbo V8s, you’ll take the wheel of AMG product and Autobahn your way to other destinations:

The Montreaux package goes for jazz in Switzerland, the Golf package hits the links in Munich with Robert Baker and Bernd Schneider, and in case you do want to see a real factory, the Spirit of SLS AMG package will trundle you off to the plant in Sindelfingen.

Each AMG engine is built by one worker, and when he’s finished building it, he autographs it

For hairier-chested adventures there are DTM and driving packages.

The first will put you in an AMG in Affalterbach, then you’ll drive to a DTM race (German Touring Cars – which are sedans put on a diet of muscles and horse steroids) in Munich or Hockenheim as a guest of Mercedes.

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The other three packages are European versions of our own AMG Driving Academy, where you can throw C63s (above) or E63s or SLS GT3s around European tracks like Le Castellet, the Nordschleife, the Sachsenring and Spa-Francorchamps, among many others.

Prices start at €570 ($828 U.S.) for Spirit of SLS AMG and go up to €6,280 ($9,122 U.S.) for Pro Training with a rented SLS AMG.

And there’s no need to wait until Christmas – tours are underway this month.

If you’re not sure what to do next, it begins with, “So honey, I was thinking…”

Jonathon Ramsey